Thriving After Breast Cancer

Did you know that 1 in 8 women in the United States will be diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetime? Although rates continue to climb, there are currently over 4 million breast cancer survivors in the United States. There is hope and early detection is key! 

My guest, Patrice Bidgood, is an amazingly strong woman who was diagnosed shortly after losing her mother to breast cancer.  Although her situation seemed daunting she thrived during her treatments and continues to do so as a survivor. 

This interview will encourage you to fight every obstacle and pursue your dreams. You can learn more about Patrice and her services at: https://www.vintagehairsalons.com/

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Transcript

Thriving After Breast Cancer

Hello, and welcome to the she exudes now podcast, a space where we discuss topics for today's woman to help to educate, encourage and motivate them to heal, to be more faithful, to build confidence and to live their best life. I'm your host, Alicia Renee. I am a Christian author and a life coach specializing in inner healing and confidence for women.

I am excited today because we are talking about a wonderful topic in honor of this month, which is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I have a guest here that is a phenomenal woman and a survivor, and she is going to come and share her story of triumph and her story of Thriving after breast cancer.

Hello. Hello, Patrice. How are you? I'm good. I'm good. All right. Thank you. [00:01:00] It's so nice to have you. We have Patrice Bidgood here with us today. She is a master stylist. She's a cancer survivor and she also works with non surgical hair replacement as well. And she's the owner of Vintage Hair Salons here in Charlotte, North Carolina.

So she has definitely Thrived and has a wonderful story and I'm so excited to get into it and share with you guys. So thank you again, Patrice, for saying yes to joining me. Thank you for having me. Absolutely. All right. Now, before we get started with our interview today, I always ask my guests, what are you exuding today?

So what would you say? I think today I'm exuding [00:02:00] me being I guess you would say selfless where I just focus more on, me loving myself and just becoming a better person and being able to use what I learned to help others. I love that exuding being selfless that's really good, especially with our topic today.

I would say I am exuding resilience. I've said it once before, it seems to be like the theme of my life, just being resilient, just, taking a licking and just keep on taking. Unfortunately, that's not the case. We have to do sometimes but I am thankful that I don't give up easily.

I'm thankful that God has my back and I'm thankful that, I'm just motivated to continue on because I know sometimes when we go through the most, that is when we are [00:03:00] so close to our breakthrough and when we are so close to coming into our greatness. So I just keep on moving. And one thing about him, girl, he ain't going to put too much on you.

You can't bear. Even though sometimes we'd be feeling like, oh my gosh, I cannot take another thing. But it's funny how we say that. And then we move on, we get over that thing and we're like, you know what, that was easy. Or, okay. Maybe it wasn't easy, I was able to do that.

And so now that has prepped me for being able to do bigger and greater things. So sometimes you have to appreciate the struggle. Yeah. Just like the weather, you don't have a sunny day, you don't have a rainy day, you might have a stormy day. Absolutely. Yeah. So Patrice would you like to just share with us a little bit about yourself?

Tell us about, yourself [00:04:00] professionally and, tell us a little bit more about your journey as well. Okay. My name, of course, is Patrice Bidgood. Like she said, I'm a master stylist that specializes in hair extensions. And I'm also certified as a non surgical for hair replacement.

 Where a lot of people who lose their hair from chemo or alopecia or postpartum depression the insurance company will pay me to fill that restriction. That's part of me being a master salad. So I've been doing hair now about 19 years, but I feel like I was just born to do hair, since I was a little girl, but I just turned into a career and That's why I'm at far as what I do as my work.

. And I am the six year breast cancer survivor. Congratulations. I've been able to tell people my story, my [00:05:00] experience, and what I went through with having cancer and things like that. That's part of my journey is to just let people hear my story and see where I'm coming from just to be able to help other women or anybody that's dealing with this disease.

Yeah, can you tell us more about how you discovered that you had breast cancer? I was at home one day I was just at home on the couch watching TV and I just happened to just do a self examination. And I just, put my arms up. I was feeling my breast and I happened to feel on my left side like under my, like under my arm and I felt a lump.

At that time I was just nervous. Because my mom, I lost my mom to breast cancer. She was like getting sick, getting a little bit more sicker and stuff like that. So at [00:06:00] that time, I just didn't believe it because just seeing what she was going through, it just made me in disbelief.

So I was just like, maybe it's just something that's just going to go away. And maybe I'm gonna say right after she transitioned, I say, about a week later, I decided to go get checked and I found out I was like, an early stage 1. Oh, wow. Wow. Did, if it was hereditary, if it ran in your family, did you know that ahead of time?

Yeah, 1st, I did a genetics test when I just ran some blood and they tested just to see if I had the genetic gene and I did. And my family do have a strong gene with this disease. I have a my old, one of my older aunts, my mom, and me, all three of us have the same kind of breast cancer, same breast.

Oh, wow. Okay. [00:07:00] Wow. But my aunt's in remission and I'm in remission, so I just feel like I'm sitting here telling my story for me and my mother. Absolutely. Wow. So you said that it was when you found the lump and you were diagnosed, it was shortly after your mom had passed. Is that right?

So if you can talk to us about, the emotions and the thoughts that were going through your head at that time, because I just really could not even imagine, having just lost your mother and now, you're having to go through the same thing. What were you thinking at the time?

Like I said, I was in disbelief. I was just like, because I was, I took care of her for the whole time that she was going through her treatments and all, surgeries, everything that she went through. [00:08:00] And I remember we had went to her last doctor's appointment. And she looked at her oncologist and she was just like, Dr.

Child, make sure you take care of my daughter. And, I didn't think that never at that time I had not got check. And then when I got a check, and they told me, that I had it, I went into a depression. I saw what it did to my mom, and I thought that it was going to come for me the same way, but I had, support people around me, let me know it wasn't a death sentence, that that I can really beat this.

So I decided, I did. I went into depression first, but then I had to tell myself I had to come out of that and I have a testimony that I have to tell this story to. There's other women, other people out here that's going through this. Some people might went through worse than what I've been through. Because everybody has.

And I came out of depression [00:09:00] and there was a program at the health department. That call project Inc. And they assisted me with all my services people who don't have insurance and you find out that you are diagnosed. There was a way people donated money that could help pay for all your medical.

Wow. You said that was project pink. Yeah. Project pink program. They're based here in Charlotte. And like I said, if you don't have insurance, health insurance, and you go, let's just say you find a lump like I did, and I went to the health department. Yeah, they other cities and counties, they have these programs that really they might not be called project paint, but they will help which are expensive.

If you're not insured. Yeah. And so I can imagine that was big for you because you were an entrepreneur and so we know that treating cancer is very expensive. So that's awesome that [00:10:00] you were able to find that. Yes. So after finding them, because I was stressed out because I was like, okay, I got this disease now, how I'm gonna pay these bills, how I'm gonna, still be able to go to work and still be able to survive and stuff like that.

That was just like a weight, taken off of me that I really appreciate from them. And then I went through maybe like a four year process of treatment. So I started out getting a lumpectomy where they just really went in there and removed the tumor, took it down and with me having a gene, I had to go through chemo and radiation as well.

Okay. Okay. So then was the. Doing those treatments, was the cancer contained or was all of it removed at that time? Or have you had a reoccurrence since then? No, I haven't. Because I've been [00:11:00] keeping up with my mammograms every year. So in the beginning, I was getting them every six months.

And then it started to see that they didn't see anything. So then I started getting them every year. So every year I go. And I haven't found anything that's good. Yeah. You're fairly young. I can tell that from a young person's perspective. Talk to us about, how that felt to, to think that, oh, my gosh, there's things that maybe I haven't accomplished or, just that, I can't believe this is happening to me because I'm still young.

I'm still youthful. Did you have any of those kinds of thoughts? Yeah, because at that time I was only 34. So now I'm 41. And I just, I was just surprised that at the age I was, because a lot of times we're not women, we're only able to get our mammogram when we turn [00:12:00] 40. That was like a fight for me, age to get a mammogram yet, but I'm like I have cancer.

I have me, my mammogram and then my family having a history. But I've joined other programs networking with other women and I've seen some as young as 18. Oh, wow. So it truly does not matter about the age.

Oh, it picks who it wants. Wow. Can you share any more about what your treatment consisted of? You mentioned that you did get the tumor removed. You had to do chemo and radiation. Did you do any natural or alternative methods of treatment? Yeah, I would say I changed my diet a lot. I took out a lot of dairy.

And, do more of a, like with milk, I [00:13:00] might not, drink regular milk. I'll do a almond milk. , something if I or lactose. Where it doesn't have a lot of hormones. Oh, okay. Because I just, yeah. And then I'll do, a little bit more juicing. I love to juice. A lot of times in the morning I like to have me a juice with some, strawberries, bananas. And I always throw like a green in there, like a kale or spinach, ginger tumeric, things like that. And drink it like, just like a morning drink juice. Just pumps you to going. Cause I know I just felt like what me having the genetic gene from my family.

That my body wasn't able to fight off, certain things that I put in my body data that another person could buy. Okay. Okay. By the natural products and, more fruits and vegetables, eating healthy and I do a little workout too. Okay, I [00:14:00] was going to ask you that too. If maybe not initially, you might not have even had the energy to work out.

But if that became part of your routine later. Yeah. So like when I was going through my treatment and stuff, cause the chemo, honestly, the chemo like right after you get chemo, you just be tired. So I didn't really have the energy to try to work out or anything like that. But I did a lot of my working out after Because I was on meds five years like chemo pills for five years.

Okay. Oh, wow. It's before they took me off all my meds like why I didn't have to take anything anymore. I started focusing on working out. Okay. I'm trying to get in two or three times a week. Okay. So with that you mentioned that you did the chemo, then you had to take the medication.

You didn't necessarily have a lot of energy when you were doing that. So what kept you thriving? [00:15:00] Because I know that. You are a very determined and ambitious person. Like you mentioned, you had a business that you had to run, that was your source of income. So what kept you thriving during that time?

I think what kept me thriving was, I think it was My mom just knowing that her spirit was inside of me just that She was a strong woman, And when she found out she had the disease it made her weaker, and I You know, I even asked myself I say, you know I was like mom out of all the stuff you've done all the achievement things you've done, you know being a strong mom You know what mom's supposed to do it's just that disease just came in her and just took over her mind and I You I told myself I wasn't gonna let it happen to me, all the way through the process of her transition.

We always will, say strong believer [00:16:00] and that was something to just stay with me. I still, I learned to balance I still, I was still working. Even though I was going I'll get my chemo on a Friday. And then, you Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, I was just down.

But then after that, come Wednesday, Thursday, that next week I was up working, I was just trying to keep in good spirits and just surrounding myself around, good, positive people that loved and cared for me, that support me. I even took therapy. Things like that just to keep my mind from thinking that oh, I got cancer.

I'm gonna die. I didn't want to think that I got this disease. It's not a death sentence and I'm going to leave and I have a story.

Yeah, that's powerful. A lot of times it is our mind, mindset is everything. And, like the Bible mentions as a man thinketh, so he will [00:17:00] be paraphrasing, but that is so true. When you have given up in your mind, you pretty much have given up physically as well.

So you're not going to push yourself. You're not going to push yourself to get out of bed, to be active to go and get that additional help and support that you need to be around people that love and support you. And just want you to be happy, sometimes laughter can be, good medicine as well.

We have to make sure that we are maintaining a positive mindset and everything that we do, and we're not going to go through the best of times. You weren't going through the best of times. You physically were not feeling well. So you had a decision that you could have made and that could have been to just lay down and let cancer do what it was going to do.

Or to get up and push [00:18:00] on and fight. And so I definitely say hats off to you for that. And kudos for making that decision that you were going to change your mindset and push forward. Anyway. First thing is to change their mindset. I've had people come to me, Oh, don't do chemo. Chemo ain't good.

Don't do this and don't do that. But at the end of the day, this is me. This is my life. At the end of the day, I have the last decision. I prayed on it. One thing I know about God, He is not gonna, He's not gonna sing you. He's not gonna stray you wrong. And he did, he's never straight wrong and I know some people that have consider doing maybe a natural alternative.

And maybe they decided that they weren't going to do chemo. And like you said, that is their decision. They [00:19:00] have to live with that decision. And if that's what was best for them whether they, Survived or not, they are at peace with that. And you have to become at peace with your decision in all things.

You have to become at peace with your decisions. Yeah. Okay. So how did you continue with your business and when did you decide that you were going to get into the non surgical hair replacement? I continued with my business. I actually started my business going through my doing my, going through my treatment.

I think that's what kept me going. Cause I found out I had the cancer in 2017. I started my business in 28. I was on the whole. During the whole process, I I just, you just kept positive believing in [00:20:00] myself. Even, with my business I would get up, open up, still work and still been able to service my clients.

I just learned balance. A lot of balance. Yeah, I was able to do that. And just just keeping a clear mind and staying focused on that. And cause a lot of times I'm on my feet a lot and I work with my hands. Just keeping me going. And then I went to a hair show a couple of years back and they have what you have call like pop up classes and I went to a couple of different pop up classes and it was one lady that stood out to me.

Her name is Nicole Ferguson and she's a really nice lady. She was explaining to us that. You can make money from insurance companies by making hair unit. And it was weird to me cause I was saying, okay, how did it work? Cause I just didn't understand. So the the medical term for non surgical hair replacement is called cranial [00:21:00] prosthesis.

And it's similar to how like someone lose an arm or leg and it's to make that for them. Yes, mine is dealing with the head. So like cranial you ever heard of people say cranial so what it is that like I said when people lose their hair from alopecia chemo And postpartum all kind of people lose their hair in all different ways.

There's several different And to myself say, you know what god telling me to go with this Because I was going do my, I was gonna get a psychologist certification, but the psychologist certification is just me getting a prescription from them, but not really getting paid from the insurance company.

. With the nonsurgical , it was just me saying, okay, I can start helping women who lost their hair. Like I lost my hair from chemo, letting them sit in my chair, letting them get, getting experience, making them feel better. , because losing your [00:22:00] hair. We all have issues when it comes to losing your health.

I don't care if you're a man or a woman, when you know, you have beautiful forehair. Five years ago, and now you haven't been in here and ball, whatever does affect you, right? And by me getting that certification, I just knew this was my way of helping out people that lost a hair. Just this is just right?

And that's awesome because. It's a big thing. People are attached to their hair, especially women. If you think about a lot of people hold their beauty or their value or their worth in their hair. And even if you don't hold it to that high of esteem, it's part of your identity.

And so as you're already dealing with this illness, now you are physically looking different. And the hair that you once had is it's gone. And so it's [00:23:00] what do you do now? How do you feel beautiful? How do still be able to portray yourself in a way that's pleasing to yourself.

And so I think that's awesome that you found a way to use your talent and skills and be able to help those who are experiencing hair loss. particularly cancer survivors as well, because you were once there. That's just a beautiful full circle moment of how you were able to use your talents and skills in that way, right?

Okay. So as far as advice, Maybe to someone that has been newly diagnosed with cancer. What would you tell that individual? I would tell someone that just finding out that they're diagnosed with cancer to have a strong mindset. The first, that's the first thing I would say. [00:24:00] And the second thing I would say is surround yourself around people who genuinely care about you.

And another thing is build a relationship with God. Because he's bigger than the doctors and all these people that will be around you. I would just tell them just, keep good faith, stay strong. If your instincts, your inner body, how you feel if you're dealing with a doctor and you feel like they don't have your best always go get a second opinion, If you feel alone And you also want to take, oh, it ain't nothing, it's just hard tissue.

Go get a second and just keep a good mindset. That's another, I like how you said with basically trusting your gut knowing your body. So knowing when to. I often think about the [00:25:00] times when I go to the doctor and maybe get a physical and they will, do the checks.

But then I had to learn that I needed to be doing some of these things on my own. And it doesn't have to be an elaborate process, but sometimes we don't know what to feel for. So as you were self examination in the beginning. Was it apparent to you that this was a lump? Was it like a noticeable difference than anything that you had ever felt before?

Yeah, it was. Like I said, when I did that self examination at home felt the lump and then how like when your menstrual cycle comes on, your hormones are kicking in, you're, tender, And that, that lump was feeling tender too. So that was another sign that my body was telling me.

Okay, something is wrong. Something. Yeah. No, go get a check. And your body do tell you things. Don't ignore them. That's just that. It's gonna go [00:26:00] away. And then you just wait too long. And let's say, You feel this long this year, then 5 years later, you might be going from stage 1 to stage 4, you don't want to yeah, you want to follow you want to follow the signs.

Yeah. Pay attention to the signs check often check yourself off and go get your mammograms even if you're not old enough. If you believe that it's hereditary, you can request one. And then just follow up, getting your annual physicals as well. That's that's helpful as well, but like Patrice said, just knowing your body and not being in denial.

I know many people that, they're afraid, basically living in fear of what could happen where, the denial could be the very thing that is going to prevent you from being able to thrive [00:27:00] and possibly be a survivor. So it's better to be proactive than to be reactive or to be waiting and, it's too late.

So definitely be proactive. Yeah, and then, the doctors, they have a lot of things they do a lot more research and stuff now. So a lot that they do now that's very helpful. Yeah, trust. Trust the doctors, but at the same time, if you are not feeling this particular doctor and maybe you you just have some additional questions, get a second opinion, again, trust your body and know that if you're feeling something that you're not getting the results or the information that you feel like you need, it's important for you to get a second opinion.

And I feel like, honestly we, because I said, I found, I've met women who've been diagnosed with breast cancer younger than me. I [00:28:00] think it should be a part of the physical. I think so too. Yeah, I don't think you should have to wait to 40. but I don't know all the stats and the requirements on that but again, if it's something that you feel is abnormal or urgent for your situation, do what's best for you.

And lastly, I just want to ask, as you were going through, was there anything that motivated you or any affirmations, any prayers or anything like that, that kept you strong, that encouraged you to just keep going? Any of that that you used while you were going through? Yeah I started learning to build a relationship with God and I was doing, I was building that relationship with him actually in the privacy of my home where I was in a part where it was just me and him.

Sometimes [00:29:00] I'll open up my Bible, and I'll read scriptures. I felt like that was his way of talking to me, , I think I was telling you about the serenity prayer was one prayer. That I always remember. , with the, God grant me the serenity to accept things that I cannot change, to encourage, to change the things that I can.

And , that's one strips I always keep in mind. And just knowing that. He had my back, doing my depression, doing my treatment. I just build that relationship with him and still today that relationship with him. My grandmother told me, I grew up in the church as a child.

Over time, going to different churches, seeing different things, sometimes she would just say, Patricia, you can build a relationship with God at home.

That was something I had always kept in mind. So he [00:30:00] became my best friend. That was something that kept my dry. Yeah. And just being around people that I knew genuinely cared about. . Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome to hear. And that was good advice from your grandmother because going to church, while it's nice, it's great.

We need that for inspiration and encouragement. We need to surround ourselves with other believers. It is the, our personal relationship with Christ. That means the difference. Or that makes the difference. And so you can have that personal relationship with him anywhere you go. And I'm so glad that you had that as your foundation and something to lean on someone to lean on.

And that serenity prayer is awesome. Where you talked about there's things that I can't change, but [00:31:00] I want to. Have the confidence basically to just know that the confidence in the strength to know that I can't change this, but I have to learn how to accept it and how to work with it.

And I trust you, Lord, to deliver me to guide me through it. And I trust whatever the outcome, that it is your will and that you have me in your will. And so I can't change it, but for those things that I can control. I want to be able to control it. And that's where we talked about our mindset. That's where we talked about, just getting out here and not letting this diagnosis hold you back.

You still were able to achieve your dreams and your goals. You started a whole business in the midst of it all. And it's just the testament of that [00:32:00] prayer of those words, and sometimes it is exactly what we think, what we repeat in our mind, what we repeat in our hearts that is able to propel us forward.

Thank you for sharing that. And I do want to ask. Oh, go ahead. Did you say something else? So I'll just say you're welcome. I do want to ask, with your story, you have been able to share and inspire with other people. So tell us about some of the great things that you've been able to do, once you got over and came into remission.

I think by me sharing my story, I was able to help other women. Help like I said, that the program I was telling you about with the project they would just call me and they would just say, I was like, their go to person, just like the biggest, And I would just go out and I would go to wherever they wanted me to be.

I was at the West End telling the story to 20, 000 people [00:33:00] or, and you just never know who the story had affected. And I'll have people come up to me. I told my story and tell me, Oh, I lost my mom to breast cancer or I, experienced having it. And. When I heard your story, you just uplift me.

And I think as I, move forward in life and just continue to tell the story. I think it is ways of helping other people, not just. I don't gain anything from this. I don't gain any money. I don't gain anything. It's just being able to let people hear what I have to say and how they take this story and use it to the best of their ability in order to help themselves and help a loved one that's going through.

Yeah. And that's awesome. We're able to use our experience and our testimony. And our resilience to help someone else who is in need. Sometimes that's all it's about. And while we're [00:34:00] helping while we're giving back, I believe that God blesses us as well. Thank you once again for just being the person that you are and giving back to others and being willing to share your story here.

I appreciate it. So as we No problem. As we close out where can people find you? My platform is IG at Vintage Hair Salon 18. My website information is vintage hair salons with a s on the n.com. And I also have my email address at vintage hair salon, 18 at gmail. com. Okay. All right.

Vintage hair salons dot com and then to chair salon, 18 on Instagram. As well. Okay. All right. Thank you so much. And I'm hoping to everyone out there. I'm hoping that [00:35:00] you have been encouraged by this story. If you or someone else is has been affected by breast cancer, I hope that you will share this interview with them as well.

Tap into some of your local resources. Patrice talked about Project Pink. That is here in the Charlotte area, but there are also resources across the country, depending on the state and the city that you live in, where you can not only get financial support, but also just emotional support and sometimes community therapists and things of that nature is it means all the difference.

So thank you so much. And until next time, everyone be blessed.